On Accepting Failure #IWSG

When I was a wee thing in school, I used to do the least amount of study needed to pass an exam. Passing was my goal, even if it meant passing by half a percent. I had no motivation to do better. Why? It wasn’t because of laziness. It was because of a fear of failure. That might sound strange considering how close I came to failing. The truth was, if I failed an exam or an assignment by not studying, then that didn’t matter, but if I studied hard, or, well, just studied in some cases, and I still failed to reach my goal, then that would’ve been the worst thing in the world. That was failure on a personal level.

Silly me and my teenage self.

Of course when I eventually did wake up and start applying myself, my world opened up. I could do more, be more. Dreams became possible. They became reality.

The thing about failure is that it isn’t a monster and neither is it the end of the world. Sometimes we have to accept failure to move forward. I’d go as far to say that failure is necessary for success. We learn through failing. We grow through failure. Failing makes us stronger and wiser.

In the Christian faith we must first recognise we are sinners and need saving before we can be saved.

People with addictions must first recognise and accept they have an addiction before they can move forward and start dealing with the problem.

Writers must first write a crappy first draft before they can shape it into the published book it’s meant to become.

To make our dreams reality, we have to apply ourselves and we have to work through those endless hurdles, closed doors, nay-sayers, and our own personal fears. Sure there will be some stumbling along the way, but when we persevere, magic happens.

What are the things that hold you back? What gets you through?

Happy announcement: The IWSG Anthology Parallels: Felix Was Here has at last been released!

What if the government tried to create the perfect utopia? Could a society linked to a supercomputer survive on its own? Do our reflections control secret lives on the other side of the mirror? Can one moment split a person’s world forever?

Exploring the fantastic, ten authors offer incredible visions and captivating tales of diverse reality. Featuring the talents of L. G. Keltner, Crystal Collier, Hart Johnson, Cherie Reich, Sandra Cox, Yolanda Renee, Melanie Schulz, Sylvia Ney, Michael Abayomi, and Tamara Narayan.

Hand-picked by a panel of agents and authors, these ten tales will expand your imagination and twist the tropes of science fiction. Step through the portal and enter another dimension!

You can get your copy from these places:
Print: Amazon, Barnes & Noble
Ebook: Amazon, ITunes, Barnes & Noble, Kobo


This post was written for the Insecure Writer's Support Group. We post on the first Wednesday of every month. To join us, or learn more about the group, click HERE.

Overcoming the Sense of Failure as a Writer #IWSG

The deep dark certainty we've somehow failed as writers is a common ailment we all get at some point in our writing career. It's part of who we are and why we write in the first place. But just because it's as common as a wart doesn't mean we have to put up with it. There are a number of ways to overcome that horrible sense of having failed as a writer. The first and most important way is:

Don't see it as failure.
You know that tenth, fiftieth, one hundredth rejection letter you're holding in your shaking hands? That isn't failure. Instead it's another stone that's been turned on a beach full of possibilities. You know that paragraph/chapter/story that's refusing to write? That isn't failure either. It's a challenge to accept, a chance to rethink, a puzzle to solve.

Mistakes and mess happen, especially when we're writing a first draft. Even when we've reached a tenth draft. The process of writing is a long, slow and messy one. We have to dig in and get our hands dirty to find a treasure. The first try is bound to turn up a wonky throw-away. It's okay, though. We can tweak, adjust, and fix until that baby shines. Or we can toss it and start over. It's just part of the process and doesn't somehow make us failures as writers.

Make failure work for you.
Say you've failed to achieve a goal. A wholesome wallow can be good for the soul. So do your wallowing, maybe eat some chocolate. But don't let the dark depths drown you. Stand up, dust yourself off and get to business. I don't mean blindly charge forward, gritting your teeth in determination until the next fall. I mean, get to the business of dissecting the failure. Ask yourself where you might've tripped up so you don't trip on the same pebble again. Learn where your weaknesses lurk. Then actively work toward strengthening those areas.

Do the same for your successes. Don't simply celebrate and move on. Analyse why you might've succeeded. Why was this time different? You might be tempted to think you were simply lucky. While luck can have a small amount to do with success, it's never the whole story, nor even the main story. If you spend the time to uncover the cogs turning behind your successes, then you'll be more likely to make success happen again.

There's so much more to writing than sticking to schedules and following the rules. We are complex creatures who feed on creativity and wild extremes of emotion. Writing helps us make sense of the chaos. So the only time we fail is when we quit writing.

What are some mistakes you've learned from?

Photo: A photo I took a few years ago in a cave on the south coast of Australia.

This post was written for the Insecure Writer's Support Group where we share our encouragement or insecurities on the first Wednesday of the month. 

To join the group or find out more, click here